Coach Doug is available for one-on-one phone coaching. He is uniquely skilled at helping folks get to the root of their food and weight issues and take practical steps forward!
Fee is $25 per half hour.
To schedule a time with Coach Doug, please call or text 904-735-3432.
Friday, December 9, 2011
Facebook Support Group
Want daily support from fellow travelers and Coach Doug? Join our free Facebook Support Group today!
Each day we post a success, a challenge, and an action step. It's fun, and it works!
Best of all it's FREE!!
Try it out today by clicking HERE.
Each day we post a success, a challenge, and an action step. It's fun, and it works!
Best of all it's FREE!!
Try it out today by clicking HERE.
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Sustainable Habit #2: Examine the reasons why you eat when you're not physically hungry and get those needs met in other ways
This is where the rubber meets the road. If we are overweight it is because we have eaten for other reasons than physical hunger. Period.
To achieve and maintain a healthy body weight for life we are going to need to re-learn how to eat within the boundaries of hunger and satiety. We were born with this ability, but for a variety of internal and external reasons we learned to eat for other reasons.
Some of us are so far from this habit that we don't even know what hunger feels like. We have lost touch with our body. We eat because we want to, because it's time to eat, because others are pushing food on us, habit, etc. We need to develop a new habit, a new mindset. Before putting each bite in our mouth we need to ask, "Am I hungry?" If not, put it down and wait until later.
The process of discovering the reasons why you eat when you're not physically hungry and finding other ways to meet those needs other than food is the most important task you have in this program. It may not easy. It may not be quick. You may need help in order to do it well and thoroughly. But it is crucial. If you ignore this habit you will chronically fail in your weight loss or weight maintenance efforts.
Following are a list of possible reasons/triggers and solutions. These are meant to get you thinking. But it is up to you to figure out your unique reasons and solutions.
Possible Internal Reasons/Triggers
To achieve and maintain a healthy body weight for life we are going to need to re-learn how to eat within the boundaries of hunger and satiety. We were born with this ability, but for a variety of internal and external reasons we learned to eat for other reasons.
Some of us are so far from this habit that we don't even know what hunger feels like. We have lost touch with our body. We eat because we want to, because it's time to eat, because others are pushing food on us, habit, etc. We need to develop a new habit, a new mindset. Before putting each bite in our mouth we need to ask, "Am I hungry?" If not, put it down and wait until later.
The process of discovering the reasons why you eat when you're not physically hungry and finding other ways to meet those needs other than food is the most important task you have in this program. It may not easy. It may not be quick. You may need help in order to do it well and thoroughly. But it is crucial. If you ignore this habit you will chronically fail in your weight loss or weight maintenance efforts.
Following are a list of possible reasons/triggers and solutions. These are meant to get you thinking. But it is up to you to figure out your unique reasons and solutions.
Possible Internal Reasons/Triggers
- anxiety
- depression
- self-hate
- punishing someone else
- stress
- lack of meaning and purpose in life
- lack of joy
- boredom
- loneliness
- rewarding yourself
- sadness
- habit
- mouth hunger
- conflict
- advertisements
- peer pressure
- wanting to please someone
- someone bringing food into your surroundings
- restaurants
- social situations
- special events
- customs
- trigger foods in the home
- exercise
- talking to friends
- working on your relationships
- counseling
- psychiatric medication
- spirituality
- life balance
- stress management
- turn off the TV
- confront those that push food
- support groups
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Sustainable Habit #7 -Develop Strategies for Ongoing Motivation
Most of us have experienced the cycle of disgust with ourselves, followed by intense weight loss efforts, followed by falling off the wagon, ending with despair. Then we start over again.
In this program we put an end to that cycle. We slowly develop sustainable habits that become part of our permanent lifestyle. Usually, in our disgust with ourselves, we launch major offenses on the enemy and get burnt out quickly. With this problem, long-term success only comes when we incorporate changes in our lifestyle that are sustainable. This will mean changing attitudes, schedules, relationships, etc. It's a lot of work! And to keep from getting burned out and quitting, you need to give yourself time to get used to small changes. In this program it's not just about changing the weight, it's about YOU changing as a person.
It is said that it takes an aircraft carrier 28 minutes to turn around. And during that time it is exerting a lot of energy, even though, for all practical purposes, it is not going anywhere! We are kind of like battleships. We need to change life direction. We don't need to learn how to go faster in the direction we have always been going. Therefor, you may need to put out a lot of effort before you begin to see tangible results. For example, it may be critical for you to learn to love your body and love yourself before you have the hope of incorporating permanent changes in your lifestyle and get successful at weight loss. And learning to love your body and yourself may take awhile. (This is just one example.)
The good news is that once you are heading in the right direction you will have momentum, meaning that it will be easier to keep going in that direction. You will still need to pay attention, and continue doing the habits, but it won't require so much effort.
Short-term motivation
We're all familiar with trying to lose weight for a wedding, vacation, bikini season, etc. The trouble with these motivations is that they have an end-date. Generally speaking, after the awaited day/season has arrived we go back to old habits, and maybe even worse because we are making up for all the deprivation we experienced. Then we frantically search for another short-term motivation.
Long-term motivation
Long-term motivation, on the other hand, has no end date. These motivations are sustainable for a lifetime, and therefor, more effective for the permanent changes we really desire. These motivations are not as flashy as short-term motivations are, but they are ultimately more effective. So let's look at some possible long-term motivations.
In this program we put an end to that cycle. We slowly develop sustainable habits that become part of our permanent lifestyle. Usually, in our disgust with ourselves, we launch major offenses on the enemy and get burnt out quickly. With this problem, long-term success only comes when we incorporate changes in our lifestyle that are sustainable. This will mean changing attitudes, schedules, relationships, etc. It's a lot of work! And to keep from getting burned out and quitting, you need to give yourself time to get used to small changes. In this program it's not just about changing the weight, it's about YOU changing as a person.
It is said that it takes an aircraft carrier 28 minutes to turn around. And during that time it is exerting a lot of energy, even though, for all practical purposes, it is not going anywhere! We are kind of like battleships. We need to change life direction. We don't need to learn how to go faster in the direction we have always been going. Therefor, you may need to put out a lot of effort before you begin to see tangible results. For example, it may be critical for you to learn to love your body and love yourself before you have the hope of incorporating permanent changes in your lifestyle and get successful at weight loss. And learning to love your body and yourself may take awhile. (This is just one example.)
The good news is that once you are heading in the right direction you will have momentum, meaning that it will be easier to keep going in that direction. You will still need to pay attention, and continue doing the habits, but it won't require so much effort.
Short-term motivation
We're all familiar with trying to lose weight for a wedding, vacation, bikini season, etc. The trouble with these motivations is that they have an end-date. Generally speaking, after the awaited day/season has arrived we go back to old habits, and maybe even worse because we are making up for all the deprivation we experienced. Then we frantically search for another short-term motivation.
Long-term motivation
Long-term motivation, on the other hand, has no end date. These motivations are sustainable for a lifetime, and therefor, more effective for the permanent changes we really desire. These motivations are not as flashy as short-term motivations are, but they are ultimately more effective. So let's look at some possible long-term motivations.
- Health and Longevity: If you want to live a long, disease-free life most medical professionals would recommend a lower weight.
- Comfort: Generally speaking, the less you weigh the easier it is to get around, and to fit comfortable into clothes, chairs, etc.
- Energy: Being fit and healthy usually means you have less fatigue and more energy to deal with life's demands.
- Spirituality: Some people see eating normally and taking care of their body as something that pleases God, or helps them be less focused on the material things of life.
- Mental Health: Over-eating can cover up emotions and situations that need dealt with. In addition, the whole diet/binge cycle causes lots of interference to our peace and serenity.
- Better Sexuality: Generally speaking, being fit and healthy not only allows us to perform better sexually, but may influence us and our partner to want it more!
- Appearance and Self-esteem: This is a tricky one because we don't want to base our self-esteem on our weight and appearance. Also, different cultures have different opinions about what size is attractive. However, being fit and healthy will generally mean we feel better about our appearance, and that can make our self-esteem struggles less intense.
Everyone's motivation is going to be different. The important thing is to have enough long-term motivations of sufficient strength to help us stay with this process forever. If you don't have enough, you can work on it. Pick ones that you have the most inclination toward and work on reinforcing them. Hopefully, the aforementioned suggestions will get you thinking.
Developing a support system to help you make and maintain your changes can be a crucial element to long-term success. Don't try to do this all alone!
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Sustainable Habit #6 - Love your body. Love yourself.
Most of who have struggled with compulsive food and weight issues hate our bodies. And we may even hate ourselves. It's time to stop this craziness! Beating yourself up does you absolutely no good. It drags down your life and enjoyment, and, ironically, leads to more compulsive eating!
At some point you have to learn to love and accept yourself for exactly who you are today. Many of us are afraid to do that, for fear that we will lose our motivation to improve ourselves. Happily, a solid self-acceptance is a great long-term foundation upon which to base our self-improvement efforts.
Live in the present. Don't get caught up pining away for a former you. Don't spend time fantasizing about a future you. Fully embrace present-you. Yes. Just as you are today. You would do it for somebody else, right? Why not give yourself the same good stuff you give to your best friend? No matter how anyone else treats you, you can treat yourself with pride and dignity. It's your choice. It's completely within your control. And nobody can take it away from you!
Start buying and wearing clothes that fit and flatter you. No more wearing old clothes that don't fit anymore, or that you are hoping you'll fit into again. Get rid of the drab, baggy, "invisible" crap. Dress for the present-you that you love and care for greatly. Live it up! Extreme Makeover has shown us that you can take any body type, any kind of face and hair, and pick the right things to bring out the most beauty.
Get proper medical attention for your current health issues. Don't say, "Well, when I lose weight I won't have that problem anymore. That may very well be true. But today you need to treat the problems you have today. It's part of loving and caring for yourself.
Be careful about weighing yourself. For most of us, our self-esteem is inextricably linked to the number that pops up on the scale. It has the power to tell us whether we can feel good about ourselves or not. This is just wrong! The scale should be used for one thing only. Information. It should give us some objective feedback about how our habits have been affecting our body. Even so, there are a myriad of things that can affect our weight from day to day - salt, exercise, water retention, monthly cycles, medicine, etc., so daily weighing tends to give unreliable information, and can increase our obsession with food and weight. (It's almost impossible to gain or lose a pound of fat in a day since you have to have have a 3,500 calorie surplus or deficit relative to the calories you burn.) Once a week or once a month can give you more reliable information about what's really happening with your body. And make sure you are weighing at the same time of the day, same clothes, etc. That way you can compare apples with apples.
Get comfortable with your sexuality. Our bodies are inherently sexual. Don't run away from it. Some people remain overweight as a way to hide their sexuality, or to avoid dealing with it. If you're afraid of your sexual urges, or other people's sexual advances, there are ways to deal with these issues other than covering yourself in layers of fat.
Some people remain fat as a way to be invisible. They don't like attention, or being noticed. Please get help with your shyness and insecurity. That's a much better option than ruining your body.
Lastly, we must deal with the issue of self-sabotage. Many of us say we want to lose weight. But when push comes to shove we're uncomfortable with success. Do we deserve to be thin? Attractive? Healthy? Happy? Some of us, unfortunately, are more comfortable with misery. We've lived there for a long time, and we know how to get by in this well-worn rut. As much as we despair about our "hopeless" situation, if nothing changes we will endure it, just like we have for years. Success is different. It is change. We may not know how to be happy. We may worry that if we're successful more will be expected from us. (Or, as mentioned before, we'll garner too much attention.) What reasons do you have for sabotaging your progress in this program, in this way of life?
Loving your body and your self is completely up to you. Why not give yourself this gift that you so freely give to others?
Worksheets
At some point you have to learn to love and accept yourself for exactly who you are today. Many of us are afraid to do that, for fear that we will lose our motivation to improve ourselves. Happily, a solid self-acceptance is a great long-term foundation upon which to base our self-improvement efforts.
Live in the present. Don't get caught up pining away for a former you. Don't spend time fantasizing about a future you. Fully embrace present-you. Yes. Just as you are today. You would do it for somebody else, right? Why not give yourself the same good stuff you give to your best friend? No matter how anyone else treats you, you can treat yourself with pride and dignity. It's your choice. It's completely within your control. And nobody can take it away from you!
Start buying and wearing clothes that fit and flatter you. No more wearing old clothes that don't fit anymore, or that you are hoping you'll fit into again. Get rid of the drab, baggy, "invisible" crap. Dress for the present-you that you love and care for greatly. Live it up! Extreme Makeover has shown us that you can take any body type, any kind of face and hair, and pick the right things to bring out the most beauty.
Get proper medical attention for your current health issues. Don't say, "Well, when I lose weight I won't have that problem anymore. That may very well be true. But today you need to treat the problems you have today. It's part of loving and caring for yourself.
Be careful about weighing yourself. For most of us, our self-esteem is inextricably linked to the number that pops up on the scale. It has the power to tell us whether we can feel good about ourselves or not. This is just wrong! The scale should be used for one thing only. Information. It should give us some objective feedback about how our habits have been affecting our body. Even so, there are a myriad of things that can affect our weight from day to day - salt, exercise, water retention, monthly cycles, medicine, etc., so daily weighing tends to give unreliable information, and can increase our obsession with food and weight. (It's almost impossible to gain or lose a pound of fat in a day since you have to have have a 3,500 calorie surplus or deficit relative to the calories you burn.) Once a week or once a month can give you more reliable information about what's really happening with your body. And make sure you are weighing at the same time of the day, same clothes, etc. That way you can compare apples with apples.
Get comfortable with your sexuality. Our bodies are inherently sexual. Don't run away from it. Some people remain overweight as a way to hide their sexuality, or to avoid dealing with it. If you're afraid of your sexual urges, or other people's sexual advances, there are ways to deal with these issues other than covering yourself in layers of fat.
Some people remain fat as a way to be invisible. They don't like attention, or being noticed. Please get help with your shyness and insecurity. That's a much better option than ruining your body.
Lastly, we must deal with the issue of self-sabotage. Many of us say we want to lose weight. But when push comes to shove we're uncomfortable with success. Do we deserve to be thin? Attractive? Healthy? Happy? Some of us, unfortunately, are more comfortable with misery. We've lived there for a long time, and we know how to get by in this well-worn rut. As much as we despair about our "hopeless" situation, if nothing changes we will endure it, just like we have for years. Success is different. It is change. We may not know how to be happy. We may worry that if we're successful more will be expected from us. (Or, as mentioned before, we'll garner too much attention.) What reasons do you have for sabotaging your progress in this program, in this way of life?
Loving your body and your self is completely up to you. Why not give yourself this gift that you so freely give to others?
Worksheets
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Sustainable Habit #5 -Create a Satisfying Dining Experience
Eating should be a pleasure! There's nothing wrong with that.
For those of us who have been veteran over-eaters we may have missed that point. We're either binging so fast we don't enjoy it, or we're starving ourselves and dreaming about the food we're missing. Neither of those experiences is satisfying.
One way to have a satisfying dining experience is to only eat food that tastes good to you. Eating things you don't like isn't very satisfying and prompts you to keep on eating in an attempt to get satisfaction. This doesn't mean you should load down your food with all kinds of taste enhancers. (As we talked about in the previous habit, learn to like the natural taste of food.) We're talking about choosing the foods within a particular food group that you like more than other food in that same group - for example, apples vs oranges. Usually, a small amount of something that tastes good is more satisfying that a lot of something you don't like.
Another satisfying practice is to take a break and actually focus on eating! Most of us have developed the habit of eating while we're in the middle of something else... multi-tasking. This is not satisfying. Beware of eating while watching TV, surfing the web, driving, etc. Generally speaking, you will tend to eat more when you are multi-tasking because you're not paying attention to your physical cues of fullness.
Create a pleasant environment. Sit at the table, add music, candles, table settings, flowers, air freshener, etc. Enjoy the experience. Eat with someone you like, so you can enjoy the interaction.
Eat slowly. Chew your food thoroughly. Savor the tastes and textures.
Take pauses and check in with your body to see how hungry or full you are. Slow down when you are getting near the point of being physically satisfied.
When you've had what will be your last bite, push your plate away or put your utensils on your plate, or get up and take the dishes away... anything that signifies you're done with this particular eating experience. Don't be afraid to leave some food behind. Eating it will not save any starving children!
Now go and create a satisfying dining experience!
The 7 Sustainable Habits
Worksheets
For those of us who have been veteran over-eaters we may have missed that point. We're either binging so fast we don't enjoy it, or we're starving ourselves and dreaming about the food we're missing. Neither of those experiences is satisfying.
One way to have a satisfying dining experience is to only eat food that tastes good to you. Eating things you don't like isn't very satisfying and prompts you to keep on eating in an attempt to get satisfaction. This doesn't mean you should load down your food with all kinds of taste enhancers. (As we talked about in the previous habit, learn to like the natural taste of food.) We're talking about choosing the foods within a particular food group that you like more than other food in that same group - for example, apples vs oranges. Usually, a small amount of something that tastes good is more satisfying that a lot of something you don't like.
Another satisfying practice is to take a break and actually focus on eating! Most of us have developed the habit of eating while we're in the middle of something else... multi-tasking. This is not satisfying. Beware of eating while watching TV, surfing the web, driving, etc. Generally speaking, you will tend to eat more when you are multi-tasking because you're not paying attention to your physical cues of fullness.
Create a pleasant environment. Sit at the table, add music, candles, table settings, flowers, air freshener, etc. Enjoy the experience. Eat with someone you like, so you can enjoy the interaction.
Eat slowly. Chew your food thoroughly. Savor the tastes and textures.
Take pauses and check in with your body to see how hungry or full you are. Slow down when you are getting near the point of being physically satisfied.
When you've had what will be your last bite, push your plate away or put your utensils on your plate, or get up and take the dishes away... anything that signifies you're done with this particular eating experience. Don't be afraid to leave some food behind. Eating it will not save any starving children!
Now go and create a satisfying dining experience!
The 7 Sustainable Habits
Worksheets
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